yeah, you need more accounts of 9/11.

But it's impossible to resist reading them, isn't it? It's like pressing on the bruise, it's like listening to Smiths songs when your already depressed, reading her love letters after you've broken up, sticking your neck out the window golden retriever style to see the subject of the ambulance's flashing light. I'm not quite being flippant here, in fact I'm being a bit confessional--I have a post 9/11 condition myself, of news-addiction. I flinch briefly before checking the news sources several times each day. First thing in the morning is usually the worst, or when I've been away from it for a while. Checking multiple sources is almost requisite (one might be missing it, maybe it just happened). Things like the LAX shooting are darkly pleasing fulfillments of that wannabe psychic impulse that made me check the news just... THEN. Like hitting re-load to see if the headline has changed and something traumatic has occurred. NOW! no. NOW! no....

Anyway, it's not as bad as last fall. I was out of the country when it happened, so I was news-deprived and language-challenged as far as keeping up with developments. The International Herald Tribune was a godsend, btw. I believe that in the future they will call this nervous news-minding something and cite statistics on it. For now I'm just a dork.